Communication and Silence

I have a hangup with communication.

I am not interested in shallow platitudes, yet I’m uncomfortably aware of how saying anything – or even saying nothing at all – will still form people’s perceptions of me.  I feel like the things I have in my mind are much too complex to communicate in mere words, and I loathe being misunderstood.

So I don’t say much.

I joke that 85% of what goes on in my head stays private – but I’m not actually joking.

Maybe that’s arrogant of me, to think that I’m so aloof and unflappable that people don’t see the real me unless I want them to.  But silence has its benefits.

People may think I lack strong opinions, or even delude themselves that I agree with them, because I don’t care to engage in arguments or prove my points to them.

I don’t believe that it’s my mission in life to save others from making “bad” choices, because I recognize that those choices are only “bad” when they’re viewed thru my own subjective lens on life.  For all we know, the “bad” or negative experiences we see others hurtling toward are an integral part of their life plans – and it’s not always my path to walk, to understand what they’re up against or why, let alone try and rescue them from it all.

The best thing I can do for those around me is to be true to myself, to love myself, to honor myself.

But to really do that, I need to communicate more and better.

It’s kind of hard to blaze new trails when you’re always covering your tracks…

So this is one of my next trails to blaze – throat chakra work…communication renewed and refined, shared without fear of consequence.

I’ve traveled deep into the caverns of my psyche, and have learned so much, come so far.  I still have much to learn, but it’s high time I start sharing more about my journeys.

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